Did you hear the one about the middle schooler who couldn’t check his school email? He used all of his online hours playing games.”
Ba-boom-ching.
Yes, I am starring in my made for the classroom series, Corona Quarantine Live.
OK, it’s taped, but with no time for re-shoots.
As all of China schools has gone online for class, there are countless technical difficulties, but no shortage of good monologue material for teachers.
I’ve borrowed a bit from Bert and Ernie for my first graders.
Since I am teaching remotely from Kuala Lumpur, my videos have one common theme: sweat.
There’s a few of us refugee teachers here and teaching remotely is crazy work. We have been glued to our phones, laptops, pads and what-nots receiving non-stop text, emails and “you are over your data limit” warnings.
Messages include rants from frustrated parents, a constant stream of dancing peach emojis from my third graders, and of course, snarky remarks from my Freshmen who don’t appreciate my sarcasm.
Since many of my students went on quarantine while on the Chinese New Year holiday, the only devices they have to view lessons is their phones. Everything has to be adjusted for a small screen size. Chinese subtitles are added for grandparents who were watching their grand-kids.
And that’s no joke.
WeChat is a great too. And if no one in my class tunes into my video?
I know the Chinese government still will.
Until Steve Colbert calls me for a guest appearance on the Late Show, I’ll continue to star in my own classroom series, Monday-Friday. And hopefully, when I return to my classroom for a live performance, my students will be sick of their phones.