So I got a real cool teaching tool for my classroom. Not sharpies or flash cards, but a monkey mask. Slightly used, but just a buck fifty. I started the class by telling the students I saw a monkey in front of the school. They weren’t impressed. As they worked on their spelling words, I had to use the restroom. […]
Monkeying Around
Morning Sickness
I have morning sickness. I know what your thinking, I’m not pregnant, I didn’t eat some some weird genetically modified vegetable that resulted in a bun in the oven. It’s just that every morning when I wake up in China, it’s still yesterday in the States, and my lawyer is firing me off emails before wrapping up her day. So […]
Thank You, TSA
Who do you complain to if the good guys are also the bad guys? If you’ve ever survived a nine hour flight to a foreign speaking country and needed your socks surgically removed upon landing, you’ve probably found a note slipped into your underwear pouch from the TSA. The thought of someone snooping through your stuff is almost as […]
Too Much Change is Still Good
I tried my best not to stare at the doll-like holes on her forehead. “I’m trans gender.” “Oh really?” My acting was bad as her hair transplant but her voice was water to my parched ears. We were in an English language desert, the Thai Immigration Bureau in Bangkok, located a three hour bus ride from anywhere familiar, as was […]
Praborommathatchiyaratchaworawihan (I can’t pronounce it either.)
It was a bit awkward standing behind a monk at Seven Eleven to buy a beer. But I didn’t care. I needed one. It was the first time I thought I was going to die, since walking down a Chinese sidewalk and almost getting plowed by a taxi. I was visiting an ancient temple in southern Thailand called . I know. […]
Temples and Tastebuds
It’s the coconut capital of the world.That’s all I knew about Surat Thani and thought it would be worth spending a day. But I quickly found out this coastal Thai city has more than what Chicago has Starbucks. I visited several, each one having its own flavor. This one had a meals on wheels program. Another temple taught young […]
The Un-memorial
I couldn’t see the beach. The white sand, all of the beer bellied sunbathers in small speedos were all washed away. All I could see was the wave of the Tsunami of 2004 hitting the Patong beach of Phuket. My mind went back to December 26th, 2004. I was in a coffee shop in Amsterdam with my husband, doing what […]
Holiday Dare
The last few days have been filled with food indulgences but not your typical holiday fare. Our school celebrated the New Year’s at a Chinese version of the Four Seasons Sunday Buffet. Usually, a picture is worth a thousand words. But in China, sometimes the translations are better, like Baked Pumpkin Mud. Imagine a Crème brûlée made with a pumpkin […]
Think Inside the Box
Duct tape has a lot of cool uses. Getting a kid to speak English is one of them. A new business moved right next to a school, a paint ball court. Yeah, just a slight distraction. But last week after installing the air ducts, the workers dumped a gazillion huge boxes into the trash. I’m talking larger than life boxes–well, […]
Some things need to be retired. But never are they people.
I cannot eat this apple, I thought as the old lady handed it to me, her beef jerky like fingers trembling, the smile under her hat lighting up the dingy room. “Xie Xie,” I nodded, admiring her face. Every wrinkle lead to a different story, from China’s Cultural Revolution to her recipe for jiaozi. Why was I at this human time capsule […]