Same Same Vang Vieng

The last time I was in Laos, I was locked out of China due to covid, floating around SE Asia with only the clothes that I had in my backpack, trying to teach online for two months. Bathing suits, mind you, do violate the dress code.. After a short stint in Kuala Lumpur to join a few other misplaced teachers, I returned to Laos until I had to evacuate the country, one of the more traumatic moments of my life, grown folks begging with ticket agents to board planes.

Why do I hike?

When I find myself literally at the end of a rope in China, hiking is the ultimate brain eraser. Either I’m concentrating on the beauty or not slipping, totally forgetting that the snack I purchased for my cat was freeze dried baby birds (I will spare you the photo).

Nails

Hopefully, someday, Easter will be restored to a holiday where I can enjoy going to church, biting the heads off chocolate bunnies instead of eating frozen pea-sicles, and thinking about the nails of the crucifixion, not mine.

Tombs and Brittle Bones

It’s sad. Folks spending eternity in a cemetery really are forgotten. We have don’t even have a word for them. We have words for the grounds (cemetery, necropolis, catacombs), words for the urns and burial stones, words for that stupid piece of plastic on the end of your shoelace (aglet), but no word for our collective of loved ones that left us their Hummel collections.

Rice 饭 Fàn

his year for Christmas, I travelled to Xishuangbanna, where rice is anything but a bland side dish. There are rice stuffed pineapples, purple sticky rice, speckled rice dumplings wrapped in Bamboo leaves, and rice stuffed bamboo shoots.

Local Color

I went to Kunming’s Museum of Contemporary Art this weekend and viewed what I thought was an abstract poodle. While I enjoyed the art, I found the streets just as colorful. This bean lady at the market reminded me of my mom. I really think it was her. She didn’t have her own booth or her own QR code, but […]

Paperwork

Working at an international school, I have been trained for fires, earthquakes. Hostage Takeovers. But what if a student gets stuck in the bathroom? It was photo day and my class was right after the snapping of pictures. Mars’ bow tie was next to the crayons. Albert’s jacket was on the back of his chair. But Yael’s kitty cat ears? […]

An American in Wuhan

Oh yes I did! I have just completed the Covid 19 Triple Dog Dare. I went on a cruise, ate at a buffet and ended up in Wuhan, then lived to blog about it. Actually, it’s not as insane as it sounds. Since I’m “land-locked” in China this summer, I thought I’d finally see the country. It’s not like I’ve […]

Pokes and Probes

So what’s an expat to do when it’s time to get back on the saddle again–wait–I mean back in the stirrups? Make an appointment at Women’s Angel Hospital for a pap smear and mammogram. Considering China makes more babies than any other countries, maybe it’s time we trust them with other female needs.

Temple Attire

So, just what do you wear to a temple or monastery, even if it’s one for chickens in Shangri La? It depends on if it’s a Buddhist temple, monastery, or the Hundred chicken temple.

Yak and Hack

Does anyone know of a good wine pairing for yak? That’s what you eat in Shangri La. And don’t laugh. Yak is where it’s at. I was referred to this little hole in the wall, a Tibetan version of a blue plate diner. I ordered Diced Yak with noodles and Yak Meat Pie. The crust was amazing. Plus, I had […]

Born to be like ginger

In America today, I officially turn into human wallpaper. It’s my birthday, or 生日快乐 shēng rì kuài lè, in Chinese. But no Barbie dolls or pin the tail on the donkey games this year. I turned sixty. The big Six-O. In dog years, I’d be dead. In America, childhoods that pre-date Google means you have become as desirable as panty […]

You Care Too Much

The three words silenced my room: “What the hell?” They weren’t from a junior high student, because the utterance would have been in Chinese. The slip of the tongue was from a second grader. From the same kid who doesn’t know his sight words. I looked at a coworker, who heard it too. While I was thinking about school policies […]

Smoke

There is a famous Chinese proverb: 不到长城非好汉. He who has never been to the Great Wall is not a true man. And after he visits the Great Wall, he picks up a pack of cigarettes.  Smoking is huge in this country, even with doctors, including my “no chicken, no OJ, drink broccoli juice” acupuncturist. Before the young doctor light his cigarette, […]

HANOI: WHAT TRAVEL GUIDES DON’T TELL YOU

In any Ma and Pa shop in Hanoi, you’ll find a shrine with tangles of incense and offerings of cigarettes, beer and moon pies. It’s the Vietnamese way of taking care of their loved ones in the after life.   I hope Anthony Bordain is one of those spirits as he loved this town. I say a prayer hoping he’ll […]

No pictures allowed

It’s a scene out of a Microsoft commercial. Divorced woman in the jungles of Vietnam approving a rental applicant for her condo in Wrigleyville, Chicago. Nice kid. Right out of school. Job at some tech firm. No credit record yet as he hasn’t used his credit cards. No record of him anywhere, not even on Facebook, which has sadly become […]

Chinese Hooterville

I didn’t think a town could get much smaller than where I grew up in Southwestern Michigan, a town nicknamed Hooterville. I especially didn’t think I could find one in a country known for big.   Chinese Hooterville is about two hours outside of Kunming, just past the Stone Forest of Shilin in Yunnan. No Shady Rest Hotel or Eddie […]

Dàbāo 大包 Big Bun

The sound of sizzle coming from my kitchen was as foreign to me as local Kūnmíng Huà. I hadn’t cooked in three years. After being a head cook at a faith based community that served three hundred and fifty every day, I hung up my apron for a while. Make that more than a while.  I had started every morning […]

Sacred Pool of Underpants

I had to get off the train. The duck intestines I had in my Chengdu hot pot a day earlier were finally catching up to mine. While the 114 local from to Chengdu to Kunming was an adventure in itself, I picked a stop by chance just to break up the journey. Emeishan. 峨眉山. Or Mt. Emei. Little did I know […]

Cheng-do!

  It was not a good day for the squirts. A twenty hour train ride. In China. I know. I’ll spare the details but that’s what I endured to make it the American Consulate in Chengdu, Sichuan, to reclaim my maiden name. While I have flown over China numerous many times, this is the first time I’ve taken in the […]

Last Two Dollars

The only thing more exhausting than visiting 10 countries in five days is visiting one country in thirty.  My trip to the USA was stuffed like my suitcase, bursting at the seams, starting in Sturgeon Bay, Wisconsin, a mere 7589 miles from Kunming, China to finalize my divorce. No happy endings, but I do get my maiden name back-and my […]

Reading People

I don’t know what smell was more alluring, the smell of old books or the red peppers. It was a hole in the wall Thai book noodle shop in Ayatthaya, Thailand. The eighty cent train ride from Bangkok transported me back in time to the land of ancient temples and cheesy paperbacks. I browsed the browning pages while waiting for […]

Bang-cha-cha-cha

  So, between my semi-annual my-body’s falling-apart check upand street-food crawl in Bangkok, I stopped at a café for a cup of WiFi when I started talking with a guy named James. He has your typical ex-pat bio. James is a former country dancer employed by a high-tech business in Portland but he’s working at the India branch. Like I […]

China Dancing: Then and Now

I was at a local dance competition yesterday at the Aegean Mall , in Kunming, China. Is this China or Chicago? I wonder what kind of dance moves the next generation of Chinese will pass down to their kids? Will it be hip hop in backwards baseball caps or traditional folk dancing with  ethnic group headdresses?